Welcome to this issue of "Dr. T's Timely Tips" by Dr. Tony Alessandra. Please send your feedback to info@alessandra.com!

Know your and others' strengths and weaknesses and communicate better with everyone!

By knowing your own strengths and weaknesses, you can emphasize your strengths and downplay your weaknesses -- and improve your relationships. And when you communicate with others with their strengths and weaknesses in mind, you have a much better chance of getting things done right -- the first time.

RELATORS
Indirect and Open

Strengths: Relaters naturally "wear well" and are an easy type to get along with. They prefer stable relationships that don't jeopardize anyone, especially themselves.

Relaters can be represented by the koala, with its accompanying slower, steady pace; relaxed disposition; and appearance of approachability and warmth. Relaters have a tendency to plan and follow through. This helps them to routinely plug along.

Weaknesses: But they have their own type of unique difficulties, especially with speaking up -- seeming to go along with others or conditions, while inwardly, they may or may not agree. More assertive types might take advantage of this Relater tendency to give in and avoid confrontation. Additionally, Relaters' reluctance to express themselves can result in hurt feelings. But if Relaters don't explain their feelings, others may never know. Their lack of assertiveness can take a toll on this type's health and well-being.
SOCIALIZERS
Direct and Open

Strengths: Socializers are enthusiastic, persuasive, and friendly. They are idea people who have the ability to get others caught up in their dreams. With great persuasion, they influence others and shape their environments by building alliances to accomplish results. They seek nods and comments of approval and recognition for those results. They are stimulating, talkative, and communicative.

A porpoise -- playful, sociable, and talkative -- can represent this type.

Weaknesses: They are naturally too involved, impatient, and possess short attention spans that cause them to become easily bored. When a little data comes in, Socializers tend to make sweeping generalizations. They may not check everything out, assuming someone else will do it. When Socializers feel they don't have enough stimulation and involvement, they get bored and look for something new again . . . and again . . . and again. When taken to an extreme, their behaviors can be seen as superficial, haphazard, erratic, and overly emotional.
THINKERS
Indirect and Guarded

Strengths: Thinker strengths include accuracy, dependability, independence, clarification and testing skills, follow-through, and organization. They often focus on expectations (e.g., policies, practices, and procedures) and outcomes. They want to know how things work so they can evaluate how correctly they function.

We picture a fox as an appropriate symbol for Thinkers -- cagey, resourceful, and careful.

Weaknesses: Because they need to be right, they prefer checking processes themselves. This tendency toward perfectionism, taken to an extreme, can result in "paralysis by over-analysis." These overly cautious traits may result in worry that the process isn't progressing right, which further promotes their tendency to behave in a more critical, detached way.
DIRECTORS
Direct and Guarded

Strengths: Directors often prefer strong directive management and operational tendencies and work quickly and impressively by themselves. They try to shape their environments to overcome obstacles en route to their accomplishments. They demand maximum freedom to manage themselves and others, using their leadership skills to become winners. Additionally, Directors often have good administration and delegation skills. Of all the types, they like and initiate changes the most.

We symbolize this personality type with a lion -- a leader, an authority. At least, they may have the inner desires to be #1, the star, or the chief.

Weaknesses: Less positive Director components include stubbornness, impatience, and toughness. Naturally preferring to take control of others, they may have a low tolerance for the feelings, attitudes, and "inadequacies" of co-workers, subordinates, friends, families, and romantic interests.

Here's to more personal insight,


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How to turn your whiners into winners... and other secrets to managing difficult people at work.

Yikes, who knew managing people would be so tough?

You have the employees who are great with data, but don't "get" the whole dealing with people thing. (The Thinkers).

Then you have the employees who are great with people, but are not so good at getting their work done and meeting their deadlines. (The Socializers).

Then you have those really nice employees who are polite and mean well, but just can't seem to get anything accomplished without your constant, hovering supervision. (The Relaters).

In addition, do not forget those bossy, occasionally whiney employees who are constantly correcting and criticizing every little thing you do... as if they're the ones in charge. (The Directors).

With so many different (and sometimes hostile) personalities to manage every day, no wonder you come home so stressed out and simply dreading tomorrow.

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