Welcome to this issue of "Dr. T's Timely Tips" by Dr. Tony Alessandra. Please send your feedback to info@alessandra.com!

Write Your Eulogy

Seriously, actually sitting down and writing your own eulogy can be a marvelous exercise in goal-setting. Make it long and detailed.

Your eulogy can become your script, telling who you were, what you did, how well you were liked.

If you are like most people, you will first list your accomplishments, successes, and positions in organizations. Then you will revise your eulogy, realizing that what you want to be most remembered for is not how many initials you had after your name or how many employees were beneath you on the organization chart.

Rather, you will probably want your life story to be about your character:

What useful things did you do?

How good a friend were you?

What kind of partner, spouse or parent were you?

How well did you behave in crises?

Personally, I want my eulogy to be more about other people than me. How helpful I was. How giving I was. What I did for other people. That I was a good husband, a good father, a good son, and a good friend.

I want it to say that my success was more a function of how much I helped other people than how I helped myself -- that my success was simply the good karma I sent out.

Of course, there is only one real way to have the sort of eulogy you want -- and that is to start living the way you would like to be remembered.

By taking a few minutes to write your eulogy today, at least you will have a life plan -- a road map -- to help you achieve those goals.

Here's to more personal insight,


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Are you living for the "dash"?

In his book How to Live a Thousand Years, Giovanni Livera leaves us with a striking thought to help us make the most of our lives. He says: On everyone's tombstone, there is a name, the year they were born, and the date of death. However, the most important item on that whole tombstone is not any of those things -- it is the dash between the dates of birth and death. The dash is your life. The quality of that life determines how many years you live -- not calendar years, but meaningful years. You could live a thousand meaningful years if your experiences are rich and fulfilling.

If everything ended right now for you, what would your dash say about you?