Welcome to this issue of "Dr. T's Timely Tips" by Dr. Tony Alessandra. Please send your feedback to info@alessandra.com!
Always give a reason Here is a little psychological trick that can make all the difference when you are trying to get someone to do what you want: Just say "because."
In his blockbuster book, The Art of Influence, Robert Cialdini describes an experiment he conducted where a student with a stack of papers approaches a line of other students all waiting to use the copy machine and asks them if they would not mind letting him cut in line.
In one variation of the experiment, the student approaches the people waiting in line and says, "Excuse me, I've got five pages. May I jump in and use the machine?"
In another variation, the student does the same exact thing, except this time he says, "May I jump in and use the machine, because I'm in a rush..."
Seems like such a subtle difference, doesn't it? However, the differences between results were anything but subtle.
* Only 60% of the students waiting in line agreed to let the student cut in front of them in the first variation of the experiment.
* A whopping 94% of the students, however, let the student cut ahead of them in the second variation.
What Cialdini's experiment sought to prove is something psychologists call a "trigger effect." Certain actions, certain gestures, certain words - for whatever reason - have a profound persuasive effect on us. Often, we do not even know we are responding to the trigger. As soon as it registers, we react. Cialdini calls this a "click & whirr" response, and compares it to the way some animals react instinctively to the markings of predators in the wild.
In this particular experiment, though, the trigger being tested was the word "because." Think about it: Because is a word we use all the time to justify our actions or reasons to other people. What the Cialdini experiment succeeded in revealing, however, is that the reasons we give are really not as important as the word itself.
Cialdini repeated the second variation of the experiment with the student using different reasons for cutting in line. Some of them were simply ridiculous, such as "Because I need to make copies." In all cases, the people waiting in line responded with the same degree of compliance.
Why? Because of "because."
What can we learn from this experiment? Consider all the times you ask people - your co-workers, your boss, your kids - to do something without explaining why you need it done. Or, consider all the times you ask someone to do something and take their "NO" as the final end all, be-all, instead of coming back with a really good answer.
In both cases, you are wasting an opportunity to use one of nature's powerful forces to your advantage. Approach them next time using the word "because" and you might find people more willing to say "Yes."
|
Here's to more personal insight,
www.alessandra.com
If you like receiving Dr. T's
Timely Tips, you'll love adding to or switching from this subscription to
"One-to-One from A-to-Z" - an ezine that's customized to match your interests,
goals and behavioral style. You'll receive fewer emails, but the ones you do
receive will contain articles, tips, ideas and offers that perfectly match your
personal and/or professional interests. Subscribing takes less than a minute and
you may experience The Platinum Rule® firsthand by
opting in here. We will treat you the way you want to be treated!
Dr. Tony
Alessandra, author of "Dr. T's Timely Tips",
is available as a speaker for corporate and trade association meetings.
Teleseminars and webinars are also available. Contact Holli Catchpole at
SpeakersOffice: 1-800-222-4383 or
Holli@SpeakersOffice.com
SpeakersOffice, Inc.
5927 Balfour Court Ste. 103
Carlsbad, CA 92008
Click here to view a Free Video of Tony.
Click here to check out Tony's Photo Gallery and get a glimpse of what he
does when he's not in front of an audience.
Time for a coffee break?
Visit Dr. Tony's products and browse while you relax.
http://www.alessandra.com/taproducts.asp
Copyright ©
2001-2013 Dr. Tony Alessandra
| | |